Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Strategies for Making Yourself Work, #6:
50 Strategies for Making Yourself Work #6: "Have someone else pay you for writing. Use the coin of whatever realm you happen to be in: someone else cooks dinner when you finish a story, or a friend buys you a cookie, or your significant other does that kinky thing with the chocolate syrup."
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Overworked and Underf*cked
Overworked & Underf*cked: December 2004: "1. Copy this whole list into your journal/blog.
2. Bold the things that are true about you.
3. Whatever you don't bold is false.
01. I've had sex in the past five minutes.
02. I enjoy oral sex.
03. I scream loudly during sex. (hell no. I've had screamer neighbors, and I've wanted to kill every last one of them. I mean, come on! Fake your orgasm quietly, you skanky 'ho)
04. I love sleeping with more than two people. (hasn't happened yet)
05. I own at least two books about sex. (mostly technique stuff)
06. I've peeked into the locker room of the opposite sex.
07. I have taken money for sex.
08. I've had sex while under the influence of a controlled substance. (several)
09. I've been in porn movies.
10. I have been the odd person in a threesome.
11. I have published the sexual exploits of a past relationship without telling my ex. (take that, limpdick)
12. I have lied to a lover about having an affair. (banged his best friend after a spectacular letdown in bed with him; thought it best to spare his feelings.)
13. I have more than ten tattoos. (none yet)
14. I like and Respect Jenna Jameson. (she's cool and all, but I'll save my respect for war protesters and the Swedish scientists working on an AIDS vaccine).
15. I like slow sex. (sometimes)
16. I have learned a lot sexually over the past year.
17. I have a sexual fantasy about another blogger.
18. I've been told I'm a great lover. (people say crazy shit when they're fucking you)
19. I carry a condom at all times. (Inspirals, baby!)
20. I'm interested in trying suspension.
21. I've broken a bone while having sex. (boner yes, bone no)
22. I have had a wet dream that I am ashamed to reveal.
23. I have had sex in the rain.
24. I have had sex while someone else watched. (dorm life)
25. I would get plastic surgery if it would improve my sex life. (never been under, don't plan to be under anytime soon)
26. I want to fuck right now! (always)
27. I like to play with food.
28. I like sex that's hard and fast. (sometimes)
29. I always brush my teeth after sex. (force of habit)
30. I shave my pubic hair. (on occasion; maintain otherwise)
31. I have traveled out of town to have sex. (who hasn't, besides red-staters?)
32. I have fantasized about having sex with my brother-/sister-in-law. (ew.)
33. I have had sex with a person from a country other than my own. (Saudi Arabia [I shit you not], Germany, England, and Mexico)
34. I dress to look sexy every day. (who has that kind of time?)
35. I have had sex with twins. (how confusing would that be?)
36. I have had sex with someone I met over the internet. (again, who hasn't?)
37. I have more than ten sex toys.
38. I like the way I look naked.
39. I have lied to get a person to have sex with me.
40. I change from one sex position to another in a specific order each time. (screw routine; variety is the spice of life)
41. I saw my parents having sex.
42. I get cable just for the soft porn. (hardcore or nothing; fuck Shannon Tweed)
43. I think legalized prostitution can reduce some crime. (legalize it, establish it in secured brothels, let the health sector regulate it, and tax the shit out of it)
44. I have a list of people I would like to see naked. (mental, but a list nevertheless)
45. I am regularly tested for STDs. (part of annual physical; I'm a lover of condoms anyway)
46. I am one kinky bitch. (after a series of purity tests, I've discovered that I'm surprisingly vanilla)
47. I'm always hungry after sex.
48. I enjoy phone sex.
49. I have been arrested for being naked in public. (skinny dipping as a teen)
50. I have had sloppy drunk sex with a stranger. (worst. lay. EVER.)
1. I have, either currently or in the past, gone over a year without sex. (18 months; it was torture)
2. I have a partially used tube of KY Jelly Astroglide close to my bed.
3. I sometimes buy clothes specifically to turn people on. (corsets, high heels, fishnets, you name it)
4. I sleep with my socks on.
5. I have gotten someone drunk on purpose.
6. I set aside some time (almost) each day to surf porn online.
7. There are nude pictures of me somewhere on the Internet.
8. My family would FREAK if they read this list.
9. I can orgasm on command. (i can't, but dude, best. talent. EVER)
10. I have had sex standing up.
11. I have leather in my closet and I'm not afraid to wear it.
12. Given the opportunity, I would have sex with a porn star.
13. I know someone who needs a copy of "Sex for Dummies."
14. There is at least one extended family member (cousin, aunt, etc.) I would jump if we weren't related. (ew.)
15. I think hose are sexy.
16. I think limited nudity should be allowed on television after 10:00 at night. (hell, encouraged)
17. I like ribbed condoms.
18. I am pierced somewhere other than my ears or navel.
19. I have had sex in the shower.
20. My parents caught me having sex.
21. My child(ren) caught me masturbating.
22. Watching other people have sex turns me on.
23. I own more than ten porn tapes/DVDs.
24. I have used a vegetable as a sex toy. (don't ask)
25. I enjoy reading erotic literature.
26. I can get wet/hard just by the sound of someone's voice. (especially if he's speaking Spanish, Italian, or French)
27. I have used a sex swing.
28. I have employed the services of a professional sex worker.
29. I have a membership on at least one adult pay site.
30. I would give up another habit (smoking, drinking, over-eating) if it meant having more sex. (in a heartbeat)
31. I would consider hiring someone to teach me about the finer points of sex.
32. Given the opportunity, I would appear in an adult magazine.
33. I think reality TV should show who's having sex with whom.
34. I get wet/hard just walking into a Victoria's Secret store.
35. I keep a "Top 5" list of famous people I would like to fuck. (Johnny Depp, Charlize Theron, Alan Rickman, Ian Sommerhalder, and Robbie Williams)
36. I have participated in an orgy. (not yet)
37. My current sex life is beyond boring. (sing it to me, sister)
38. I am actively looking for a new sex partner. (always)
39. I do NOT think having sex always means making a long-term commitment. (fuck that)
40. I have at least one sex toy made of glass. (i want one of those nifty Pyrex dildos)
41. I think anti-pornography laws are too restrictive. (fuck you and your dildo-free ilk, Jerry Falwell)
42. People would be surprised if they knew how often I think about sex. (oh, totally)
43. I think 16 is a good age to begin having sex.
44. I have special names for my sex organs.
45. I have used sex to get what I want.
46. I think the world would be a better place if people had sex more often. (make love, not war)
47. I think some public nudity should be legal. (encouraged, even)
48. I have at least one sex toy that is purple. (three)
49. I think a blogger orgy would be ... interesting. (and messy)
50. Just reading this list makes me horny."
Monday, October 18, 2004
Guardian Unlimited | Guardian daily comment | An American scapegoat in London
Guardian Unlimited | Guardian daily comment | An American scapegoat in London
Monday, July 26, 2004
Monday, June 14, 2004
The Dead by James Joyce:
The Dead by James Joyce:: "A few light taps upon the pane made him turn to the window. It had begun to snow again. He watched sleepily the flakes, silver and dark, falling obliquely against the lamplight. The time had come for him to set out on his journey westward. Yes, the newspapers were right: snow was general all over Ireland. It was falling on every part of the dark central plain, on the treeless hills, falling softly upon the Bog of Allen and, farther westward, softly falling into the dark mutinous Shannon waves. It was falling, too, upon every part of the lonely churchyard on the hill where Michael Furey lay buried. It lay thickly drifted on the crooked crosses and headstones, on the spears of the little gate, on the barren thorns. His soul swooned slowly as he heard the snow falling faintly through the universe and faintly falling, like the descent of their last end, upon all the living and the dead."
Thursday, June 10, 2004
Saturday, March 20, 2004